Fuzz

I used to never really get angry...maybe once in a while..when I was really provoked...but quite a few times..pretty rare incidents that I can recall...
Anger is aberrant...it brings down the ability to make sensible decisions...It impels you to take reactive ones... and I'm pretty sure bout one thing...reactive decisions are dangerous...they can really fuck things up..
Things are really different these days...I have these anger surges almost every time.. Its like these rage waves creating storms inside my head...
I spoke to a friend today...She was one of my best friend once upon a time...not anymore.. we had a fight...and I dunno... that was quite a long time ago...
So we were all engrossed in a casual conversation while she managed to say something to get me rabid...
I know it wasn't so bad to react the way I did...  but I couldn't help it...
I cut the conversation  then and there...
walking away...I could feel my head getting heavier..night was setting in... and I could see all of the lights blurring...I knew what I had to do...or rather what my body wanted me to do...I take stumbling steps as I scurry across the road..escaping the passing cars..My earphones were already in my head by now... blasting to the Zeppelins...
I see the dybbuk eye to eye and he instantly knows what I needed...I pull out my illuminator...and light up the dybbuk's gift...smoke clouds in front of my eyes...one drag...and things start getting better....another one and my head was now lighter than before....
I step on the remains of my cigarette...everything seemed to make sense now...nothing was blurred anymore...
no more anger...no more hate...